Blessed

Things are starting to sink in, that we are leaving for a good long while. I started pulling boxes from the closet. This time, things are either going with us, they are memories we aren't ready to depart with, or things that will be given away. I teared up a few times yesterday as I pulled out different things that I will no longer have use for. It is sad to leave this place. Drew and I have both grown up in Chattanooga, we both have our families and many friends nearby, and this is where we love to be. When we are anywhere else, people get sick of our stories of Chattanooga, how much we love being here.

I often explain to people when they ask what its like to live in another country that once you settle in more than one place, or travel enough to feel a part of another culture and people, you never will feel completely at home. When we are in the States, we feel like we are missing part of life in Bolivia. When we are in Bolivia, we feel like we are missing part of life here. There is always an aching for something else that feels so familiar and comfortable. Its a blessing and a curse.

As emotional as it may be for me, it doesn't mean I am not excited about the next step in life. Not having a job right now has been good for me. I spend most days at home getting things ready for our trip. I have had a lot of alone time, time to pray, think and read. It seems each week carries me through a different emotion and step in this process. This week, as you can guess, it has been one of remembering and missing the things that are so familiar to me in Chattanooga.

Instead of the sadness overwhelming me, I have been more overwhelmed by how blessed we are. Drew and I have full support from both of our families. It is a sacrifice for them to let us go too. And they are letting us go with their blessing. We have our home Churches that have been very encouraging and supportive as we seek to share about our work in Bolivia. We have friends that have expressed their sadness in seeing us go, but excitement at continuing friendship over a distance.

Most of all, I have felt encouraged and blessed through my faith. I feel a peace and comfort despite my sadness to leave Chattanooga behind. I am thankful to have this as my constant, not matter where I am, or how I am feeling. I pray my focus in all this will not be what I am missing from one place or another, nor who I wish I could see again. Rather I pray my focus will be that I can be thankful in everything and rest in the peace that God has called us, and will lead us where we need to be.

⁸ “But you, Israel, my servant,
Jacob, whom I have chosen,
you descendants of Abraham my friend,
⁹ I took you from the ends of the earth,
from its farthest corners I called you.
I said, ‘You are my servant’;
I have chosen you and have not rejected you.
¹⁰ So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

¹¹ “All who rage against you
will surely be ashamed and disgraced;
those who oppose you
will be as nothing and perish.
¹² Though you search for your enemies,
you will not find them.
Those who wage war against you
will be as nothing at all.
¹³ For I am the LORD your God
who takes hold of your right hand
and says to you, Do not fear;
I will help you.
¹⁴ Do not be afraid, you worm Jacob,
little Israel, do not fear,
for I myself will help you,” declares the LORD,
your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel.
¹⁵ “See, I will make you into a threshing sledge,
new and sharp, with many teeth.
You will thresh the mountains and crush them,
and reduce the hills to chaff.
¹⁶ You will winnow them, the wind will pick them up,
and a gale will blow them away.
But you will rejoice in the LORD
and glory in the Holy One of Israel.

Isaiah 41:8-16